“He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.”
— Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil
“It is not sex that bring us meaning, it is not power that brings us meaning, it is suffering that brings us meaning.”
— Victor Frankl
Confronting The Enemy
To begin the journey of self-transformation, we must confront the enemy that resides within, unveiling the mask that conceals our deepest fears, and staring into the hollow abyss where the illusion of self resides. It is here, in this void, that we come to the unsettling realisation: there is no self to transcend. While this statement may seem simple, almost dismissive, it fails to capture the profound difficulty and horror that truly accompany this path to transcendence.
My personal experience was marked by trauma and upheaval. However, the bedrock of reality remains unchanged, and the pursuit of truth demands the dismantling of all illusions. If we are to achieve true freedom and happiness, we must strip away everything, revealing our truest form. Liberation can only be achieved by breaking down all limitations, a process fueled by the force of self-loathing. That’s why the work is so challenging—it defies all forms of collective reasoning and demands a journey into, and through, the abyss.
Aleister Crowley saw the Abyss as a transformative and defining stage in Thelemic philosophy, marking the boundary between the physical world and higher spiritual consciousness. It represents a critical turning point in one’s spiritual journey, where one must confront Choronzon, the chaotic force that signifies the dissolution of the ego. Crossing the Abyss requires total surrender of personal identity, letting go of all attachments and illusions. It is a profound spiritual test, demanding the complete annihilation of the self.
Contrary to the popular notion of being born as blank slates, or tabula rasa, we are not free to shape ourselves into anything we wish. Our real purpose is to become who we truly are at our core. As I have discussed in earlier works, this process calls for deep clarity and awareness of the present moment. The present gains meaning only when we fully awaken to it, drawing sharp lines between past, present, and future, allowing us to truly live in the now.
It’s a shamanic breakdown, a complete removal of all personal illusions and emotional clutter—what some might call metapuke. And there are absolutely no guarantees.
Nihilism
Jed McKenna, in his series of works on spiritual enlightenment—Spiritual Enlightenment: The Damnedest Thing, Spiritually Incorrect Enlightenment, and Spiritual Warfare—takes a unique approach to the concept of nihilism. His critique of nihilism diverges from the traditional philosophical interpretation and offers an insightful perspective on its role in spiritual awakening. Through a blend of humour, scepticism, and raw insight, McKenna explores nihilism as a state of disillusionment that many people encounter when they peel away life's false meanings but have yet to touch the deeper truths of existence.
McKenna views nihilism not as an end in itself but as an intermediary state. It represents the moment when individuals reject societal constructs and belief systems but have not yet moved beyond to a place of true, direct understanding of reality. It’s a stage where one is caught in the “void”—liberated from the illusions of meaning yet stuck, clinging to the absence of meaning itself. This, McKenna suggests, is a trap. While rejecting traditional beliefs may feel liberating, it often leaves individuals stranded in an empty, bleak outlook. This is not true enlightenment, only a temporary stopping point on the way to real liberation.
For McKenna, true enlightenment involves going beyond nihilism. It requires the dissolution of not just belief systems but also the concepts of meaninglessness that come with nihilism. In his view, enlightenment is a direct, experiential awareness of reality as it is—without the interference of intellectualisation or philosophical constructs, including nihilism. To stay in nihilism is to miss the ultimate truth, which lies in pure, unmediated awareness.
This critique of intellectualism speaks volumes in a world where so much value is placed on mental analysis. McKenna reminds us that true spiritual insight cannot be achieved through intellectual means alone; it must be experienced, lived, and felt in the deepest part of our being. Speaking from personal experience, I can affirm this truth: the real objective of the work is to engage in the work itself. Honestly, I’m not sure I would recommend this path to everyone.
Nostalgia
Today, many individuals find themselves grappling with a pervasive sense of stagnation and dissatisfaction. They ask, "What is this nothingness that surrounds us? Why does everything feel stagnant, like we’re stuck in a rut? Where has creativity gone? Why are individualism and originality under attack?" These questions point to a collective cultural malaise, a sense that we are trapped in a loop of nostalgia, with nothing truly new or original emerging. The world seems painted in shades of grey—grey buildings, grey boxes, grey lives—all lacking in character, individuality, and creativity. This has caused many of my friends to struggle with depression, anxiety, and despair, overwhelmed by a sense of helplessness in the face of what I’ve come to call “the nothing.”
This cultural stagnation can be traced back to several factors, including rapid technological advancements, economic instability, and the pervasive impact of social media. Our current era of "goldfish memory media" is one where tweets, TikTok videos, and viral moments dominate our attention, fleeting and quickly forgotten. This constant cycle of shallow content reduces our ability to engage deeply with any one idea or concept. As a result, creativity and critical thinking have taken a backseat, replaced by quick consumption and short-term gratification.
The rise of technology has diminished genuine human interaction, as machines have inserted themselves into our daily lives. Under the control of their creators, they’ve isolated individuals, confining them to digital "light boxes," where paradoxically, connection with others is only possible through the very machines that separate us. The increasing mortality rate from deaths of despair and the mental health crisis, particularly among young people, paint a stark picture of a society in decline, one that is far from healthy.
Nostalgia also plays a significant role in this cultural stagnation. The ease with which we can access past media has created a reliance on the familiar, comforting experiences of the past, further contributing to a lack of innovation. Rather than pushing forward, we retreat into the safety of what we know, and companies capitalise on this by using nostalgia to sell us products, leaving little room for new ideas and creative exploration.
Individualism
Ayn Rand’s critiques of collectivism and her advocacy for individualism provide a useful lens through which to understand these cultural trends. In her works, such as Atlas Shrugged and The Fountainhead, Rand underscores the importance of individual achievement and creativity in driving progress. Her character, Howard Roark, serves as a symbol of the individual’s struggle against conformity. Roark refuses to compromise his artistic vision, even when society demands it, illustrating the tension between originality and societal pressure.
The same ideas are echoed in contemporary critiques of modern culture. Jack Mason’s podcast, The Perfume Nationalist, explores how art, culture, and even something as specific as fragrance intersect with individual expression. The podcast delves into the impact of modernity on aesthetics and creativity, advocating for a return to traditional values and deeper engagement with art forms.
As we confront the homogenisation of culture and the erosion of individuality, we must recognise the value of creativity and uniqueness. True progress and liberation lie not in conforming to the expectations of society but in the fearless pursuit of our authentic selves. This requires a commitment to innovation, an appreciation for depth and originality, and a rejection of the grey sameness that pervades modern life.
Authenticity
Ultimately, as Foucault once suggested, true freedom may be found in the shadows, where those who are not fully enmeshed in the systems of power are free to exist in their own authenticity. In this sense, the path to self-transformation is not about becoming someone new, but about rediscovering who we were meant to be all along.
In the end, the challenge is clear: we must make ourselves and our lives into works of art. That is how we unshackle the chains that bind us.
There’s still a lot more to explore in upcoming essays—this is only the beginning of our journey.
Go ahead and share this with your friends; I’m sure they’ll enjoy reading the thoughts of a so-called psychopath urging everyone to fully embrace nihilism in all its glory.